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Somedays are just heavy...

Mar 28, 2023

I generally like to think of myself as an optimistic person.

I hope that most would say I bring a positive energy to my work and those around me, at least when I am at my best. But, somedays...

Yesterday was one of those days for me. One of those days where I saw mostly insurmountable mountains yet to be climbed, felt the anguish of things that seem too big and complex to make any kind of meaningful impact towards. One of those days I could feel my own negative energy draining me.

I spent many years unable to find joy in the big and small moments, and days like yesterday can feel like a scary step back in time.

I know that it's ok to have those days. Sometimes our world feels full of fear and hate - to pretend that's not overwhelming for me sometimes, wouldn't be authentic. I feel the big hurtful stuff deeply the same way I feel so much joy in the day to day. The way celebrating someone else's success can truly light me up inside is the same way someone else's pain and sorrow can bring me to my knees. Although I much prefer the former, I wouldn't give up either of those abilities to connect to others.

I've learned it is important to let myself honour those hard days, to actually let myself feel those negative feelings vs just pushing them aside and pretending everything is ok. I also know that is not a place I want to stay. Although days like yesterday often inspire me to continue the work I do, staying in those 'ick' feelings doesn't lead to creating work or change in a positive and productive way. So this morning on Lead Up!'s Jump Start Coffee Chat, we talked about how to bring ourselves back from those rough days (or weeks?) regardless of what put us in the 'ick' to start with.

One of our members shared that remembering they have a supportive group of friends and our Lead Up! Community to lean on helps them not feel they are in it alone. This was a BIG ah-ha for me. I have been so fortunate to build many personal and professional relationships over the past few years of simply awesome humans that are incredibly supportive. When this isn't something you've always had, you can become hyper independent and forget we aren't supposed to be able to, and don't have to go it alone.

When I'm not feeling my normal positive self, I tend to retreat or isolate. Although sometimes I need that time to myself to process before moving forward, I also know connecting with clients, colleagues, friends or family is what will ultimately bring me back in alignment.

Getting outside and moving is another great way to realign your energy. If you love to laugh, spending that solo-time watching your favourite comedy might ready you to bring your best back the next day. Journaling so that it doesn't all stay inside is another great outlet.

As for yesterday's 'ick', it was a social media post shared on Dr. Tiffany Jana's Instagram story that helped to pull me back in from the dark, negative energy. I try to be intentional about who I follow on social media so that my feed is full of diverse perspectives and I prioritize those that I learn from, provide positive challenges to my bias', and will inspire me over creators and posts that will leave me comparing, upset or depleted. Sometimes 'Insta-friends' (those people we've maybe met once, or even never met in person, but somehow connect with through their posts/content) can be another great resource to dig out of the 'ick'. I'll post the quote they shared in the comments because this is getting long! Huge thank-you to Dr. Jana for doing what you do and so generously sharing your awesomeness - if you also enjoy learning, positivity and laughing a lot you should follow them too (@tiffanyjana on Instagram).